Peace Love Happiness – How I Turned My Cranky Christmas Mood Around
Ramona asked, “Do you always feel peace love happiness and energy? Do you ever feel tired and cranky? Do you ever just wake up on the wrong side of the bed?” I responded, “Definitely. I do focus on creating good feeling days. That IS important to me, but, I have my cranky days too. Here is one Christmas I would like to forget…”
My finger throbbed like someone was beating it with a hammer. My teeth chattered loudly, like one of those wind-up false teeth toys. I raced into the house to escape the cut-you-to-the-bone 20 degree below wind chill. I did not even take off my coat as I walked straight to the bar. My brother-in-law Tom was there with a knowing look. He handed me a glass of wine and we exchanged our annual banter,
“How’ is going it Tom?”
“Suzie, you know me I am just doing what I am told to do.”
I toasted Tom and boisterously announced our arrival, “Merry Christmas Everybody! Peace love happiness and joy to all!” Christmas 2005 at my sister-in-laws house in Carmel, Indiana.
“He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree.” —Roy L. Smith
I’d slammed my finger in the car door that svgdaily.morning at Jeffs’ (my husband) parents’ house. The pain in my finger matched my mood perfectly. Internally I felt bruised and empty. Externally I felt tired and banged up. I did not feel anything close to peace love happiness or joy that day.
How did I get here? Where did I “lose” my ‘I want feel peace love happiness and joy’ wake up eager direction? How had I managed to create such a cranky mood at Christmas? I drank too much wine and ate too much food throughout the day. I never got around to feeling much better. Thank goodness my in-laws have known me since 1993, and they love me, or I am sure they would never invite me back!
Back home I nursed my finger and the cold I had caught. Both were born out of me not taking care of my mood, my energy, or myself. Over the next few weeks I worked my way back to a feeling more sunny, peace love happiness and joy feelings.
From this better feeling attitude and mood, I reflected on what I had created. I could see the trail I took to get there…
I had booked a training class in Pittsburgh in mid-December. I hate the cold and really did not want to do it, but they needed me then, so I agreed to their schedule.
I took on additional assessment business. It was last minute, rushed and I did not really have time, but they needed my help.
I felt guilty because we were not going to S.C. at Christmas (where my folks live), so we squeezed in a trip over there.
I agreed to a dinner party with retired family friends at Reynolds Plantation. They depend on us and were anxious to see us for the holidays.
We went to three different Christmas parties. Only one was full of people I really wanted to spend time with, the others felt like obligations.
I attended several group luncheons because I thought they expected me to be there.
“There is no ideal Christmas; only the one Christmas you decide to make as a reflection of your values, desires, affections, traditions.” —Bill McKibben
I could add more to my, ‘How I Lost my Peace Love Happiness and Joy Self and Created a Cranky Christmas Mood in 2005’ list, but I think you probably get the point. Bottom line: I had stopped taking stock of what was best for me and my life. I tried to please, soothe, help and serve everyone else. In my desire to be all things to everyone I was not emotionally energetically available to anyone.
All that ‘yes’ing’ led to a burned out I-have-nothing-left-to-give feeling. All of which led to a perfect collision for a throbbing finger, a cold and too much wine, food and sulking.
Y.E.S. – Positive Attitude Tips for More Peace Love Happiness and Joy. I am happy to report that i have not had another cranky, ‘I hate Christmas’ since. I even like Christmas again.
These three simple, but not easy, tips help me, time and time again, create more peace love happiness and joy in my life. They work in any area of life – at work, in weight loss and around troubled relationships.
#1: Y-Say YES to, embrace, acknowledge, express and write about how you really feel.
Do not pitch a tent and stay there, but be honest with yourself. This honesty will help you begin to move out of your ‘mood’ and eventually, help you make new decisions and changes.
Anytime you are eating, drinking or doing anything too much, the origins can almost always be found in stuffed, unacknowledged, unexpressed feelings. I was exhausted and overwhelmed which I didn’t acknowledge. I just kept slapping on my happy face and offering false, but positive thoughts and words.
If I had acknowledged how I really felt, if I had been more honest with myself, I could have made new decisions along the way before I landed in the cranky Christmas ditch. Acknowledging the truth, saying Yes to how you really feel, helps you to craft a plan to create something new and different in the future.
YES – AFFIRMATION:
“I am where I am, and where I am is really good. Knowing where I really am, in this moment, helps me get to where I really want to go.”
#2: E-Empower Yourself, Decide to Take Ownership.
When you’ve embraced how you really feel, you can move past it, with much less blame or judgment. You can move forward more quickly taking ownership of what you can change.
The only person you can control is yourself. When you decide that you’re in charge of what you say yes to and how you focus your mind and spend your time, it’s easier to begin making more decisions for yourself that help you lean toward more peace love happiness and joy.
“I am responsible for how my life turns out, and that means I will make more deliberate decisions about how I focus my mind and my time.”
#3: S-Selfishness, Doing What Feels Good Is Love.
If you unconsciously say yes to things, just to please others while ignoring what pleases you, you’ll run around empty, tired, cranky, and you’ll eat and drink too much.
If you’re selfish enough to tune into what you need to find, feel and live with peace love happiness and joy every day, then you’re full of love and life. Embracing selfishness makes sure that you have something of yourself to give to others. You must decide that feeling good and happy is worth something. I’ve come to believe it’s, in fact, everything.
“The best gift I can give others is my own peace love happiness and joy, and I can’t give it, if I don’t have it.”
“Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind.” —Mary Ellen Chase
This is my formula for getting and keeping peace love happiness and joy within. When we’re cranky and tired, we haven’t lost our love peace happiness and joy, we just have to use the Y.E.S. formula to cultivate and grow it.
Would you like to Wake Up Eager to get to work? Be an inspiration to other people? Be more productive and happy? Achieving this is my mission too.